The World's Best Football Team

When you read the title I am pretty sure the first thought that comes to your mind must be, "Pooh, its just another post about all the famous international players and a dream team". I would partially agree to that, it is surely a dream team but it consists not of the international players. It is comprised of a small group of amateurs who called themselves


Main Main Log United



 (the 'united' is just to please 2 kaptis)


This team had its own share of Messis and Ronaldos who were nicknamed Massi and Bhosadaldo for their skills. While one was a defender, the other was the striker. What characterized them as great players was their dedication to the game, while one broke his hand while trying to execute a difficult manoeuvre which even the great Messi fears to do, the other played an entire game while he was ill with a terrible illness ( read loose motions). I m pretty sure he never used those underpants ever again.


We even had our own Gianluigi Buffon, an expert goalkeeper and an even brilliant engineer. The only problem was that the rest of the team wasn't sure whether he was playing for them or the opposition due to some controversial hand movements which led to the opposition scoring almost in every match. Why I mentioned him being an engineer was that he had a unique ability, he could lock his knee at one place and stay that way.


Lets talk about our star striker, an experienced ( by that I mean old....really old...he outlived his pet turtle) and surprisingly agile Wayne Rooney fan. He was the one who opened the goal account of the team that too against one of the strongest oppositions, though not much later he had to retire from the sport due to family commitments and  well.......age.

Mr. Bhosadaldo was the hunk driving - ball dancing - adult movie loving free kick expert of our team. His 'untiring' effects on the ground were very well noticed by everyone around for which he was provided with more than one 'GOD'ly praises.

Our midfielders were the real stars of our team, the sprinters, expert ball controllers, thigh bone breakers.....you name it, they had done it. 

The Harry Potter lookalike, love-troubled white boy who sprinted like Milkha Singh and ensured he was omnipotent on the ground. 
The tall lanky (not anymore)left-winger, Mr. Maan who technically was among the top 3 players in the team whose undying devotion to the game saw him break his leg, get operated for hernia and made him experience how to use crutches (which landed him the highest paid job from amongst the team, though he would never accept it, if you don't believe me ask Babua)

We then come to Mr. Babua, the anti-love, six pack, sad hits superstar who managed to convert all his anger for his ex to the game and made scintillating displays, he even doubled up as a goalkeeper when our Buffon lost the key to his knee and it stayed locked.

Lets not forget our own Ryan Giggs, his sole focus was the ball so much so that he would refuse to recognize his own teammates at night to the point of asking, "Who are you?" while pointing a torch at their faces. 
Finally the star midfielder, 'The Sin' who managed to get people off their seats with his tricks/antics and skills and managed to survive a murder attempt on him when 'the earth' tried to hit a iron made volleyball post on his head.

The entire team knows that the team wouldn't be this good had it not been for their defenders who, lets face it, touched the ball more than the rest of the team because of the superb passing amongst themselves. Who did you think taught Pep Guardiola all that stuff? The defenders manage to frustrate the opposition and well, their own team by keeping the ball in their own half for most of the game.


The right side of the defense was held by Massi who mesmerized the other team with his exquisite jogging style and ball clearance. 

We had Mr. TigerTurn in the center, who was the backbone of the defensive lineup, who laughs like a tiger's roar and who with his brute physical strength used to terrorize the strikers. If he didn't get to hit the ball, he would surely make it up by hitting the players shin and add an abuse to it.
We also had the other 'superstar actor-dancer-duet singer-director-nose rubber' tall center back whose throw was so great that he used to take the free-kicks and goal kicks using his hand. This talent of his made him a celebrity in the local football leagues.

The substitutes who really made up during the loss of our regular players deserve an applause. 

We have 'Mr. Father of the Nation' whose undying spirit on and off the field was well appreciated, especially for the photographs and videos which made us review the oppositions strategy and our own on tape.
We have our own national 'Golf Champion-bike rider- chocolate fingered boy'  whose calm demeanour fooled the other team when he knocked out their star striker with a foot to his gut. He took immediate retirement from the game as the ring which kept him calm was lost during that game.
Our south Indian Anna charmed everyone with his ability to run in straight lines without any consideration for the goal post.

As for me, I would just say

I had the privilege to captain the "World's Best Football Team

Comments

  1. "Too good..!! I don't think anybody could describe the 'Dream Team' better that this!! :)

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  4. well done...it is genuinely a very good artistic and creative effort at finding humour in our faults .u actually found something true to write about everybody which just shows how unique v all are.. makes for a very interesting and nostalgic read..so glad and proud to be part of the dream team...win ,lose , made no difference..our game was all heart...cheers

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  5. Just absolutely loved it..d language, the flow n most of all the way u have captured the essence of our game..good job!!! Just 1 thing i had to ask..
    me..love-troubled...really???

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  6. Awesome writing man! Took me back to our days at the ground.
    But you just cant get away with single line about yourself..let me fill in:
    The Singer - Defender - Captain - Coach never lost hope on the greatest team ever even when they failed because he knew that we were meant to do bigger things, like winning Champions League eh... You were also there for all the practice sessions (don't flatter yourself, you stayed nearest to Five Gardens, while we traveled distances in rains in crowded trains) - even when there was swine flu outburst ;) :D and some people bunked.

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